I'm feeling super tired. The comp's screwed. I turned it off at 10.15pm because it was frigging lag and i don't have the patience for this laggy comp to keep me awake. But i tried again and it isn't lag now. Ohwell.

Back to lessons today. Got back chinese gong han and i got some smashing lousy mark. I can't believe my chinese is still a bloody C6. Where the hell did my A2 go?! Grr. This is so pissifying. Gohsm didn't come to school today, so the whole class just lagged and studied for module for abit. Mr liu's class was free period too. Early break for 5 minutes.

After break had talent time in 3H which kind of fell under expectation. I mean, it was funny and all but.. okay i don't knw what to say. =/

Module test was damn.. I'm gna flunk it for sure. Once i got the paper i stun there for about 5 seconds before i even knw what to write. It's not difficult, it's just that i can't recall a single thing which i studied. So another one flunked.

My essays were so short i think they look like source based questions. I wrote halfway and fell asleep =x In a slumber i was thinking 'okay, im gna finish the paper' and so the next word which i wrote on the paper was 'okay' which was so NOT supposed to be there luh.

Went for the jab today. And tell you what, i can't believe im such a weakling. First was height and weight. Zzz i think i need a diet like right now. And don't try to convince my horrendous weight is due to muscle mass, i don't buy that crap.

Next was the stupid jab and lihui told me to go first. So fine, i went first. No feeling at all. Was sort of anticipating the weird feeling i felt in promary 6's jab but it didn't come. It only started to ache after the jab. And i almost fainted, can you believe it. I'm such a bloody weakling luh.

I was like standing in the queue to wait for the doctor's check-up and then i saw the lights overhead spinning. And i squat down to rest for abit, then lihui and pearly told me i looked pale. So i went into the classroom again. The nurse said it was because i didn't take my lunch before the jab. Crap. I'm a weakling.

And the doctor's check-up was darn retarded. I sat down, he looked at my list of allergies or illness. Everything was a 'No' so he said 'Hmm very fit. Take care.' Signed his name, chopped the clinic's chop, his name's chop, and i go out and pay 10 bucks for this. CON LUH.

Now there's still this faint throb of the ache every 3 seconds or so. Damn it. It ruined my appetite yknw, and i got no mood to do anything at all because of it. This sucks. Tmr's gna be a long day, going NEWater factory for learning journey. Hope it'll be fun with hapsburg!

And im so gna miss the 9.30am dismissal time. The daily mugging session with josephine, daniel and qinhui. All the fun and stress the exam brings. It must be better than the result getting time. It's the start of my Dooms Week ):

& yknw what, i think i'd be able to write a 3 factor essay on why my life is so frigging screwed up now and get a full marks for it. Because no one can understand it better than myself.

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And im bloody screwed up today. Everything just keeps screwing up, nothing's going right. Please don't blame me, i can't handle. I just feel inferior is all. I'm sorry.

And i just can't bring myself to do this. No matter it is to the first matter or the second matter. I just can't do it. What can i say? I don't want to force myself to ever do anything ehich i don't want to, and no one can make me too. Pertaining to the first matter, it will be alright, i hope.. I'll just have to try real hard..

But the second matter, im really sorry. And that's probably everything i can say. Because no one will understand, i just can't force myself into it. I'm just so sorry. I don't want anything anymore.