It's one problem after the next, one mistrust followed by another. It's all a big mess of complications now i don't even knw where to start, how to rectify every one of these twisted and horrible untruths. When did all this start... that would be a good 4 months ago. Never did i knw it would cause this long chain reaction of a trouble after another.

It didn't start out to be like this at all. How is it possible that such a simple thing would snowball and link into something that is so...pissifying?! The worse thing is that, it is so incredibly tedious and just DIFFICULT to explain to anyone. I just cannot belive how...this is like some story you knw. I thought such links were only possible in story books! Carefully planned and drafted. I didn't think it would ever happen in real life...not at all.

A whole big mess of complications and misunderstandings. I no longer knw who is telling the truth or not. Who to believe, who not to. And just what everyone else has to do with everything that is my business and not any of theirs! I'm so sick of this. Just because of this one thing, that led to many others and it gets more and more complicating on the way. All because of one person... It's hard not to hate that one person.

But perhaps i learnt more about myself. And it's time for some self-reflection.

Because of #1 and the relations, #2 happened and i found out about #3 which is so painfully unacceptable. Where is the trust i had in the people around me? Gone, obviously. Maybe it had never even existed from the start.

& what's trust at all?

Never felt like crying in a long time...and im sorry but im never going to believe in trust again.